Hey there,
So what have I been doing for the past couple days... I've been trying to broaden my scope to the on-line dating thing. I have 2 profiles now. 1 on Match.com and 1 on ChristianSingle.com and though one may seem to have more of a Christian theme and hopes to meet someone with the same moral and belief that you have it turns out I am receiving the same kind of responses. Well, one guy just sent a message to tell me not to give up on my morals and values to appease anyone which I appreciated but I would like to be attracted to the person as well and someone not that old. While someone else told me though they appreciated my "smile" I was not the match that he was looking for. Now, I don't know if my pictures are just ugly or because my profile in Christian Single also states that I'm celibate. So, it's a slow road and if anything I'm learning that it doesn't matter what the site tries to provide the people are pretty much still the same and doesn't want anyone that puts it out there that they are not having sex until marriage.
I give it to people that have found someone that would do that with them... wait. I don't know. I'm not that enthused to continue in the quest but I have no choice with the subscription they both end in October so I still have time. I still have other events and things like that.
Long story short, I'll still write and blog about things but I probably will not check my profile that often because it's like hoping for a puppy for Christmas and getting an air plane from radio shack that'll break in 2 weeks.
I don't think I'm that unattractive. Someone asked for a picture and I sent it to them and I haven't heard back since lol maybe I am. oh well. I think you have to actually be Megan Goode and not have sex lol they have something to look forward to. :-)
Nice girls finish last too.
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
Monday, July 14, 2014
I'm not alone....
Why add your religion to your profile.
Good Morning,
I've been sitting here pondering on something. I noticed all the websites ask about religion, race, employment, etc. The thing that gets to me is why are people very lopsided when it comes to some things and not others. ok, let me explain. You have your set races that you want to date and you won't waver on those... White, Pacific Islander, Middle Eastern.... Or employment or the amount of money someone makes, or they must have a degree... But everyone puts their religion down... Catholic Christian, Christian/other, Christian/Protestant, Jewish, etc... Yet, I put that... and have a disclaimer that I'm not having sex until marriage which from my understanding we're all suppose to do that... lol I am told I need to adjust because no one is going for that... Or they say that's fine as long as you will do other things. I ask... Like what?.... Of course, they think oral... UM, that's still a form of sex people.
I'm not saying I'm perfect but I'm trying to be better. I'm not saying I'm better than anyone else and that I'm some robot but have we all become so sexualized that you can't even Court/date and get to know a person for real before you have sex. I won't adjust my standards... why should I... Yours is materialistic, educational, employment status or race... Mine is trying to do the right things. I don't get it. Why do I have to conform too you when you may be temporary.... If you can't get a connection without physical connections then what happens when you get older... or God forbid become paralyzed, or really deal with some for sickness or for health...
what then... I don't know. What's the point of putting that you are a Christian, Muslim, Jewish religion for that matter when you look like everyone else. What distinguish you from everyone else? So when you get married... that's when you'll follow the rules.
Another thing I was thinking of... If an Atheist doesn't believe in God, then is their marriage just legally based. Who sets up the guidance on the marriage if it's not biblically based. Do they still say for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health. Is there sanctity in their marriage if they don't believe in it? I'm confused. Must be all legal then. What would be their foundation... the fact that they don't believe in the God that even gave the guidance of marriage... with Adam and Eve... Does that even make sense?
Not bashing just was pondering on things.
I've been sitting here pondering on something. I noticed all the websites ask about religion, race, employment, etc. The thing that gets to me is why are people very lopsided when it comes to some things and not others. ok, let me explain. You have your set races that you want to date and you won't waver on those... White, Pacific Islander, Middle Eastern.... Or employment or the amount of money someone makes, or they must have a degree... But everyone puts their religion down... Catholic Christian, Christian/other, Christian/Protestant, Jewish, etc... Yet, I put that... and have a disclaimer that I'm not having sex until marriage which from my understanding we're all suppose to do that... lol I am told I need to adjust because no one is going for that... Or they say that's fine as long as you will do other things. I ask... Like what?.... Of course, they think oral... UM, that's still a form of sex people.
I'm not saying I'm perfect but I'm trying to be better. I'm not saying I'm better than anyone else and that I'm some robot but have we all become so sexualized that you can't even Court/date and get to know a person for real before you have sex. I won't adjust my standards... why should I... Yours is materialistic, educational, employment status or race... Mine is trying to do the right things. I don't get it. Why do I have to conform too you when you may be temporary.... If you can't get a connection without physical connections then what happens when you get older... or God forbid become paralyzed, or really deal with some for sickness or for health...
what then... I don't know. What's the point of putting that you are a Christian, Muslim, Jewish religion for that matter when you look like everyone else. What distinguish you from everyone else? So when you get married... that's when you'll follow the rules.
Another thing I was thinking of... If an Atheist doesn't believe in God, then is their marriage just legally based. Who sets up the guidance on the marriage if it's not biblically based. Do they still say for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health. Is there sanctity in their marriage if they don't believe in it? I'm confused. Must be all legal then. What would be their foundation... the fact that they don't believe in the God that even gave the guidance of marriage... with Adam and Eve... Does that even make sense?
Not bashing just was pondering on things.
Sunday, July 13, 2014
Happy Sunday Everyone,
I hope you've had a great weekend. So what happened at the Match.com Stir event. For one, I had so many detours and got lost for over an hour from the time I left my hour to the time it started. It started at 6pm. I got there about 7:15pm. By this time, I didn't care how I looked, what was in there or anything.
So I walk in and there was a table to write your name and put on a name tag. Well, the name had to be a guilty pleasure. Of course I write shoes and purses. I guess it's a good conversation starter. The crowd was a good mix of men and woman. I came in, got a drink and walked around. I stood off to the side because I didn't come there with anyone (some people brought a friend). I had a long weird conversation with this guy who is a lawyer and works in the area. He starts talking about things that I really didn't have an interested in and since he asked where I lived and I live in Maryland he starts talking politics. I'm sorry, I really don't know about politics. I should get more involved in who our representatives are but I just bought my house so in a way, it didn't matter as long as they kept doing a good job that I didn't have to know who my representative was. So that made me feel stupid. I think I should read up on politics to prepare myself for conversations like that and not sound like I had a balloon head waving in the wind. Then I found out the guy is Jewish and he's 47 years old. Well, that wouldn't work out for me to say the least on either counts. For one, I'm not converting to Judaism and my age range I'm looking for is 33-40 that's a good 7years. I just want to grow old with a person together... and have something to talk about while we're around the same age. Not to be discriminatory.
So after that, I was like whew, and thought of an excuse to go back inside... I ran in to some ladies and we chatted. Well, one of them, had a date down the street at a restaurant/bar and she asked if I could go with her to meet him. I said, how far is this place she said across the street. Now, she says she doesn't drink but she sure seemed LIT. So I went with her. The guy was so cute... Kind of farm boy like, I'd date him, but he is also Jewish, Oh and so is she. The guy must didn't like her wild nature in her "soberness" and he made up some excuse and left. Said he had to get up early.
So after that she bounced to some guy at the bar who was HOTT... 40year old and looks like he should be on Greys Anatomy. salt/pepper hair and whew... well, to him (I asked) she seemed Loose... I said yeah she kind of seemed that way and she was sober. His friend he was with is engaged and so he and I were dancing so I can teach him some rhythm. lol He doesn't know he can move his hips.
So to sum it all up. The night was a bust. It was interesting. I can say I have tried the stir event. I'm sure a lot of them got numbers. All I got was the sober/lit Jewish girls number lol.
WRONG TEAM lol.
On Saturday, while in a funk, I decided I wasn't going out anywhere and was going to spend time by myself. Then some friends of mine invited me to a kickball/cookout event. So after a couple hours I finally decided to go. Can I tell you I had so much fun. With some really good people and awesome conversation. We talking about all kinds of things, in a campfire type circle and just had fun... Challenged each other and got and gave advice on being in this Christian Journey.
After that, I went to First Baptist Church of Glenarden to a Single Ministry event. That was so much fun. Ran into an old High School friend and just met some good people. Played kickball, volley ball and had some good food.
Come home feeling fulfilled and glad I went out.
So to sum up the weekend. It was interesting and fun and I can't wait to do other events... Probably not with Match but with FBCG because they would be more on the same level of what I'm trying to do and be... and continue to hang out with the other group I was with.
Until next time...
I hope you've had a great weekend. So what happened at the Match.com Stir event. For one, I had so many detours and got lost for over an hour from the time I left my hour to the time it started. It started at 6pm. I got there about 7:15pm. By this time, I didn't care how I looked, what was in there or anything.
So I walk in and there was a table to write your name and put on a name tag. Well, the name had to be a guilty pleasure. Of course I write shoes and purses. I guess it's a good conversation starter. The crowd was a good mix of men and woman. I came in, got a drink and walked around. I stood off to the side because I didn't come there with anyone (some people brought a friend). I had a long weird conversation with this guy who is a lawyer and works in the area. He starts talking about things that I really didn't have an interested in and since he asked where I lived and I live in Maryland he starts talking politics. I'm sorry, I really don't know about politics. I should get more involved in who our representatives are but I just bought my house so in a way, it didn't matter as long as they kept doing a good job that I didn't have to know who my representative was. So that made me feel stupid. I think I should read up on politics to prepare myself for conversations like that and not sound like I had a balloon head waving in the wind. Then I found out the guy is Jewish and he's 47 years old. Well, that wouldn't work out for me to say the least on either counts. For one, I'm not converting to Judaism and my age range I'm looking for is 33-40 that's a good 7years. I just want to grow old with a person together... and have something to talk about while we're around the same age. Not to be discriminatory.
So after that, I was like whew, and thought of an excuse to go back inside... I ran in to some ladies and we chatted. Well, one of them, had a date down the street at a restaurant/bar and she asked if I could go with her to meet him. I said, how far is this place she said across the street. Now, she says she doesn't drink but she sure seemed LIT. So I went with her. The guy was so cute... Kind of farm boy like, I'd date him, but he is also Jewish, Oh and so is she. The guy must didn't like her wild nature in her "soberness" and he made up some excuse and left. Said he had to get up early.
So after that she bounced to some guy at the bar who was HOTT... 40year old and looks like he should be on Greys Anatomy. salt/pepper hair and whew... well, to him (I asked) she seemed Loose... I said yeah she kind of seemed that way and she was sober. His friend he was with is engaged and so he and I were dancing so I can teach him some rhythm. lol He doesn't know he can move his hips.
So to sum it all up. The night was a bust. It was interesting. I can say I have tried the stir event. I'm sure a lot of them got numbers. All I got was the sober/lit Jewish girls number lol.
WRONG TEAM lol.
On Saturday, while in a funk, I decided I wasn't going out anywhere and was going to spend time by myself. Then some friends of mine invited me to a kickball/cookout event. So after a couple hours I finally decided to go. Can I tell you I had so much fun. With some really good people and awesome conversation. We talking about all kinds of things, in a campfire type circle and just had fun... Challenged each other and got and gave advice on being in this Christian Journey.
After that, I went to First Baptist Church of Glenarden to a Single Ministry event. That was so much fun. Ran into an old High School friend and just met some good people. Played kickball, volley ball and had some good food.
Come home feeling fulfilled and glad I went out.
So to sum up the weekend. It was interesting and fun and I can't wait to do other events... Probably not with Match but with FBCG because they would be more on the same level of what I'm trying to do and be... and continue to hang out with the other group I was with.
Until next time...
Thursday, July 10, 2014
Thursday July 10th... Still in the game
Hello all 10 people that have visited :-),
Well, this week is almost complete and I have still been getting winks and emails messages. I know they must have read my profile because the conversation is different which is a good thing. The conversation does not even enter into anything sexual. We are actually talking about life, relationships, fun things we like to do, cracking jokes and just getting to know each other as much as you can through email. It has been nice. Not overly excited but nice and better than the messages before. YAY. :-)
Tomorrow is the Match-Stir event so I'll write back tomorrow to let you know how it goes. I wonder if I'll be the only darker skinned person there. Hey that's fine LOL I don't mind the swirl. I am mixed so it'll all work out :-)
Let you all know what happens.
Well, this week is almost complete and I have still been getting winks and emails messages. I know they must have read my profile because the conversation is different which is a good thing. The conversation does not even enter into anything sexual. We are actually talking about life, relationships, fun things we like to do, cracking jokes and just getting to know each other as much as you can through email. It has been nice. Not overly excited but nice and better than the messages before. YAY. :-)
Tomorrow is the Match-Stir event so I'll write back tomorrow to let you know how it goes. I wonder if I'll be the only darker skinned person there. Hey that's fine LOL I don't mind the swirl. I am mixed so it'll all work out :-)
Let you all know what happens.
Wednesday, July 9, 2014
So here I am .... at 33 single...and why a blog...
Hello there,
My name is Lina and I am here on BlogSpot to talk about this journey I'm on. I named this Christian, Dating and Celibate because that's technically what I am. I'm a Christian, I'm starting to get myself out there to date and being Celibate. Let's first explore the title of the blog... Being a Christian is all good and there are a lot of Christians out there that claim their faith but not live it. I'm not a Bible thumping, rock throwing, holier than thou Christian but I am trying my best to do the right things and be a good person, and Loving God and Loving people. I'm trying to be forgiving and all that jazz... you know being a Christian...People always say, "the Lord will bring him/her to you in His timing and not yours" "Men are suppose to pursue you and not the other way around". Well, what if you work from home, or barely get out the house, or not a clubber/bar person, What if you go to church and no one approaches you and what if the people you like have no clue what they want. I mean it's hard out here. I get it, The Lord will bring him to me and all that jazz but he's not going to come knocking at my door and say HEY, I'm here the Lord sent me just for you. LOL...Hence the Actively part of the link name... I think I should be actively putting myself in the environment that "the one" could walk up to me or approach me. Since I work from home.. yes, everyday. So I don't get out much except for Church.
Now, the Celibate / Waiting part of the blog and link... is obvious I would think. Trying to be a good Christian and trying my best to do better and follow the order that was meant for us, I have decided to be Celibate. I am several months... yes, months into this. I hope to be a year soon. How long this has been going on, I don't think I'll display all that information but just know, NOTHING is happening. I want to be married and want my husband to be the one I'm with sexually. I do have a son who is 16 and have had my share of "situationships/relationships/freindswithbenefits" and guess what... They didn't work out and were based on the wrong things and had no true foundation. I'm 33 now and I want more in my life than what I had. I can admit I didn't value myself much in my twenties and thought it was "fun" but like I said, here I am 33 and single. I've learned about myself, about what I want in life, about life itself and I have learned about love especially loving myself more and more everyday.
Now that you understand the name of the blog, the link and the reasoning behind it... Here is why I'm writing this and what I plan to do with this blog and I hope you can give me tips, encourage me, learn from me what to do and what NOT to do, because I'm sure I will make several mistakes, and share your experiences with me. I don't want to be bashed or any negativity on my blog. I am a loving person and want to display love even if you have something you want me to do better or learn from you, please say it in love and remember, I can't tell how you're talking in a message so if it comes off harsh to you, I may take it harshly. ok. :-)
WHY a Blog: 1) I'm bored and it sounded like a good idea in my head, 2) Someone else maybe going through the same so if I can shamelessly display my journey I hope you are encouraged and/or don't feel alone I'm with you in this, 3)if I meet someone I want to share it with the world lol. 4) like I said it sounded like a good idea LOL. 5) I have no clue what I'm doing
What I plan to do with this blog: I plan to share with you my days, my experiences, my dates, my embarrassments, my transparency, my naïve fantasy of seeking love vs. the harsh reality of trying to find love. Do I know everything NOPE, not at all, Do I have an idea of what I want, yeah but who doesn't... I have set up a Match.com profile 2 days ago so this popped in my head after the first phone encounter...You must continue to read to find out what happened.
MATCH.com:
Like I said, I set up a match.com profile the other day and put up a generic profile or who I am, what I like, what kind of guy would interest me and so forth. It seemed, to me, to be a good profile. I received some likes, winks and even messages. So one guy I thought, oh he's interesting, He's Christian, ok, let me send him a reply message. Everything went well so we exchanged numbers and later on he gave me a call. We chatted and on the first conversation says something that made me say... oh, you know I'm celibate. He said you're joking right? I said no, I'm serious... (while laughing because I'm sure he was shocked). He said not even Oral, I said NO not even oral. He continues to ask questions, "what happened in your past?, What did you're last experience do to you? How long are you planning to do this for, the "90day thing"? I said "I hope to keep it up until I get married" "I hope I don't fall and slip up LOL". He said... in a serious voice Well, maybe you should sleep on it, and by tomorrow about noon, if you haven't changed your mind then I'll know you can't make any adjustments to this craziness you're talking about".... So I laughed and said ok, well, have a good night and good luck in your search" he said good night to you and good luck to you....
Well, the next day came, I spoke to my best friend "K" about this conversation and she's very blunt and I love her for all the truths she talks to me about. She said...what... well I know you're not going to change your mind... As I'm talking to her about this, He text me and says "I guess you've decided... you need to put that mess on your profile... Better yet, you need to delete your Match profile all together. Match is not the place for you, no one is going for that Celibacy talk... But good luck to you LOL"
So in shock and out of utter bafflement I'm reading this to my best friend and she says "He's an A$$. Don't let that Jerk discourage you, there is someone special just for you.
After the day went on, I updated my profile and added a blurb about my celibacy and if it was ok with them, to wink and message but if not, to pass me by. Later I tried to delete my profile out of discouragement and thought, maybe this fool is right. Everyone is out for a quick fix or a relationship with sex is involved so I went to try to deactivate it. so I went through the process but lo and behold, I have already paid for the 3 months and it will be deactivated Oct 7th. So I thought...and "K" said, well that's good because you shouldn't be discouraged by ONE person who you got to see their true motives and colors. So, I'm still on Match.com and actively looking while waiting. Since then I have still received some winks and messages. Less than the first day but to thy own self be true, I'm glad it's fewer because it's less to weed out. They know they couldn't handle the celibacy dating then It's good they passed me up. But they are missing out on a good thing if I do say so myself. LOL..
I've decided to go to one of those "STIR" events they host on Friday So we'll see what happens. I'm extremely nervous, I'm taking a chance, and you never know. That someone maybe there, waiting for me. :-)
So with all that said, Welcome to my blog and thanks for being on this journey with me. I am not grammatically correct, nor will this be without typos or have a dyslexic feel to it but if you don't mind that... I'll write back soon.
~Lina
My name is Lina and I am here on BlogSpot to talk about this journey I'm on. I named this Christian, Dating and Celibate because that's technically what I am. I'm a Christian, I'm starting to get myself out there to date and being Celibate. Let's first explore the title of the blog... Being a Christian is all good and there are a lot of Christians out there that claim their faith but not live it. I'm not a Bible thumping, rock throwing, holier than thou Christian but I am trying my best to do the right things and be a good person, and Loving God and Loving people. I'm trying to be forgiving and all that jazz... you know being a Christian...People always say, "the Lord will bring him/her to you in His timing and not yours" "Men are suppose to pursue you and not the other way around". Well, what if you work from home, or barely get out the house, or not a clubber/bar person, What if you go to church and no one approaches you and what if the people you like have no clue what they want. I mean it's hard out here. I get it, The Lord will bring him to me and all that jazz but he's not going to come knocking at my door and say HEY, I'm here the Lord sent me just for you. LOL...Hence the Actively part of the link name... I think I should be actively putting myself in the environment that "the one" could walk up to me or approach me. Since I work from home.. yes, everyday. So I don't get out much except for Church.
Now, the Celibate / Waiting part of the blog and link... is obvious I would think. Trying to be a good Christian and trying my best to do better and follow the order that was meant for us, I have decided to be Celibate. I am several months... yes, months into this. I hope to be a year soon. How long this has been going on, I don't think I'll display all that information but just know, NOTHING is happening. I want to be married and want my husband to be the one I'm with sexually. I do have a son who is 16 and have had my share of "situationships/relationships/freindswithbenefits" and guess what... They didn't work out and were based on the wrong things and had no true foundation. I'm 33 now and I want more in my life than what I had. I can admit I didn't value myself much in my twenties and thought it was "fun" but like I said, here I am 33 and single. I've learned about myself, about what I want in life, about life itself and I have learned about love especially loving myself more and more everyday.
Now that you understand the name of the blog, the link and the reasoning behind it... Here is why I'm writing this and what I plan to do with this blog and I hope you can give me tips, encourage me, learn from me what to do and what NOT to do, because I'm sure I will make several mistakes, and share your experiences with me. I don't want to be bashed or any negativity on my blog. I am a loving person and want to display love even if you have something you want me to do better or learn from you, please say it in love and remember, I can't tell how you're talking in a message so if it comes off harsh to you, I may take it harshly. ok. :-)
WHY a Blog: 1) I'm bored and it sounded like a good idea in my head, 2) Someone else maybe going through the same so if I can shamelessly display my journey I hope you are encouraged and/or don't feel alone I'm with you in this, 3)if I meet someone I want to share it with the world lol. 4) like I said it sounded like a good idea LOL. 5) I have no clue what I'm doing
What I plan to do with this blog: I plan to share with you my days, my experiences, my dates, my embarrassments, my transparency, my naïve fantasy of seeking love vs. the harsh reality of trying to find love. Do I know everything NOPE, not at all, Do I have an idea of what I want, yeah but who doesn't... I have set up a Match.com profile 2 days ago so this popped in my head after the first phone encounter...You must continue to read to find out what happened.
MATCH.com:
Like I said, I set up a match.com profile the other day and put up a generic profile or who I am, what I like, what kind of guy would interest me and so forth. It seemed, to me, to be a good profile. I received some likes, winks and even messages. So one guy I thought, oh he's interesting, He's Christian, ok, let me send him a reply message. Everything went well so we exchanged numbers and later on he gave me a call. We chatted and on the first conversation says something that made me say... oh, you know I'm celibate. He said you're joking right? I said no, I'm serious... (while laughing because I'm sure he was shocked). He said not even Oral, I said NO not even oral. He continues to ask questions, "what happened in your past?, What did you're last experience do to you? How long are you planning to do this for, the "90day thing"? I said "I hope to keep it up until I get married" "I hope I don't fall and slip up LOL". He said... in a serious voice Well, maybe you should sleep on it, and by tomorrow about noon, if you haven't changed your mind then I'll know you can't make any adjustments to this craziness you're talking about".... So I laughed and said ok, well, have a good night and good luck in your search" he said good night to you and good luck to you....
Well, the next day came, I spoke to my best friend "K" about this conversation and she's very blunt and I love her for all the truths she talks to me about. She said...what... well I know you're not going to change your mind... As I'm talking to her about this, He text me and says "I guess you've decided... you need to put that mess on your profile... Better yet, you need to delete your Match profile all together. Match is not the place for you, no one is going for that Celibacy talk... But good luck to you LOL"
So in shock and out of utter bafflement I'm reading this to my best friend and she says "He's an A$$. Don't let that Jerk discourage you, there is someone special just for you.
After the day went on, I updated my profile and added a blurb about my celibacy and if it was ok with them, to wink and message but if not, to pass me by. Later I tried to delete my profile out of discouragement and thought, maybe this fool is right. Everyone is out for a quick fix or a relationship with sex is involved so I went to try to deactivate it. so I went through the process but lo and behold, I have already paid for the 3 months and it will be deactivated Oct 7th. So I thought...and "K" said, well that's good because you shouldn't be discouraged by ONE person who you got to see their true motives and colors. So, I'm still on Match.com and actively looking while waiting. Since then I have still received some winks and messages. Less than the first day but to thy own self be true, I'm glad it's fewer because it's less to weed out. They know they couldn't handle the celibacy dating then It's good they passed me up. But they are missing out on a good thing if I do say so myself. LOL..
I've decided to go to one of those "STIR" events they host on Friday So we'll see what happens. I'm extremely nervous, I'm taking a chance, and you never know. That someone maybe there, waiting for me. :-)
So with all that said, Welcome to my blog and thanks for being on this journey with me. I am not grammatically correct, nor will this be without typos or have a dyslexic feel to it but if you don't mind that... I'll write back soon.
~Lina
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